The first step for all self improvement comes from self-awareness. We are so often driven by our habits, desire, compulsion that majority of the things we do everyday are done without deliberation.
Remember the last time you picked up your phone and checked Instagram or Whatsapp even if there’s no particular need to? Ya that’s probably 5 minutes ago. And how many times did you do this throughout the day? You probably never keep track but just about every time there’s a gap between activities, you would be doing that.
That’s what these apps and the companies behind them are so great at. They understood human tendencies and everything is designed to capture our attention without us being aware of it. But anyway I digress.
To break off these unhealthy habits, we must first learn to catch ourself in the act of doing. To be actually aware that we are in the midst of doing something purely by instinct, and to stop doing it.
But this is probably not enough as we need to dig into the second level of self-awareness – What are we feeling when we are engaging in automated behaviours, or even what feelings are we avoiding?
These can be pretty harrowing experience because eventually it must lead to the third phase which can be rather unpleasant – What are the things we are missing, or not realising about ourselves? Usually it’s not a good trait. That’s why our brains try to steer us from noticing it.
For example, there are many times that we are irritated by an attention-seeking friend. But why? It’s none of our business. Or maybe we are irritated because the friend is taking attention away from us? Sometimes. Maybe. Just one example. Try thinking back to the last time you are upset about someone or something, and honestly ask yourself why did you feel that way.
However it can be a nasty downward spiral so just practice this self-awareness magic for just a few ‘levels’ down. You don’t want to keep second guessing yourself. All you need to know is that you probably should stop or change any unhealthy habits or outburst of emotions, understand your emotions or what emotions you are avoiding, and learn what are the areas that you are not so good at.
Ultimately, the goal is to accept yourself with all your flaws and all, and then learn to improve.
My thoughts 